Mishap With A Love Potion
by cookiesrforme
Summary: It's Valentine's day. Everyone is supposed to be happy and in love. But Harry Potter isn't. So Ginny has decided to slip him a love potion that will make him fall in love with the first person he sees. Unfortunately for Ginny, the first person he sees is Draco Malfoy. But something bizarre happens. The potion doesn't work! Hermoine has an answer... But it isn't pretty.


**Summary: It's Valentine's day. Everyone is supposed to be happy and in love. But Harry Potter isn't. So Ginny has decided to slip him a love potion that will make him fall in love with the first person he sees. Unfortunately for Ginny, the first person he sees is Draco Malfoy. But something bizarre happens. The potion doesn't work! WHY THE HECK DIDN'T IT WORK?! Well, Hermoine has the answer for us... And it isn't pretty.**  
**Warnings: SLASH! No likey, NO READ-Y! Just kissing. No sex though. Other than that, nothing.**  
**Disclaimer: I no own Potter, the Goddess of Writing (a.k.a J.K. Rowling) owns Potter. And Malfoy. -goes to sob quietly in a corner- I own nothing.**  
**Pairings: Draco/Harry, minor Ron/Hermoine, minor Ginny/Neville**

**A/N: Sort of crack-ish :P (so, it's hilarious) Also, it's really short, so sort of a one-shot. Set... I don't know. In whatever time period. ENJOY MY LOVELY READERS!**

**3RD PERSON POV**

It was going to be _perfect_. The potion was made and slipped into Harry's drink, Ginny was sitting directly across from him, and it was Valentine's Day! Nothing, or no one, could ruin this now!  
Ginny cackled to herself.  
"Harry, my dear, sweet kangaroo, are you going to drink your pumpkin juice?" Ginny chirped. Harry looked at her strangely.  
"...Kangaroo?" He repeated.  
"YES! Or would you prefer, perhaps, my slick seal?"  
"..." Harry was considering the fact that Ginny had lost her mind, but to hopefully shut her up, he picked up his pumpkin juice and took a sip.  
At that moment, someone tapped his shoulder. As he swallowed he looked up at none other than Draco Malfoy. Harry pouted, as his stomach flipped. (He had the tiniest crush on Malfoy. Very, very tiny. And he had only had it for like... A year! *Or two*)  
"What do you want? It's Valentine's Day! Go away and wear a pink tutu!"  
"I'm afraid Granger already took that wonderful suggestion, Potter." Indeed, Hermoine was wearing a pink tutu. With rainbow-colored unicorns on it.  
"WHAT IS GOING ON!?" Ginny shrieked. Draco and Harry both turned.  
"That's an excellent question, my darling sloth." Harry smiled.  
"Sloth?" Draco shook his head.  
"She started it."  
"You-you're supposed to be in love!" Ginny wailed. "And it's PET NAMES! They're supposed to be adorable and cute!"  
"Wait.. Who am I supposed to be in love with?" Harry said in confusion.  
"The first person you saw! Which was supposed to be me, but it's MALFOY! You're supposed to be in love with MALFOY!"  
"I think she's gone off her rocker, Potter. You should dump her." _And come to me_, Draco added mentally.  
"No, I'm NOT CRAZY!" Ginny screeched. The people nearby covered their ears. "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE IN LOVE WITH MALFOY, MONKEY!"  
"She's barking mad." Seamus muttered, glancing up from his food for a second to glare at her, and immediately went back to his meal. Even the staff table were giving them weird looks by now.  
"Wait, Ginny... Did you slip me a _love potion_?" Harry looked horrified.  
"No! Yes. Maybe! But, duckling, it was just supposed to make sure that you were actually in love with me! Why doesn't it work?!"  
"Maybe you brewed it wrong?" Draco suggested.  
"Shut you mouth, Malfoy! I never do anything wrong!" Ginny seemed to be on the verge of tears. Harry regarded her solemnly.  
"Of course, Ginny dear."  
"I'm perfect!" Ginny insisted. "I'm... I'm... I'm like the goddess of... Of... Sand!"  
"Sand?" Draco whispered.  
"I don't know what's wrong with her." Harry whispered back.  
"WHY DIDN'T IT WORK!? AND WHY ARE YOU TWO TALKING LIKE YOU'RE FRIENDS?! YOU AREN'T FRIENDS!"  
"Oh, my God, stop screaming!" Hermoine said in exasperation. "And love potions don't work when the person that consumed the potion is already in love with the person that they were meant to fall in love with."  
Everyone froze, as if magically, they all heard Hermoine speak.  
"But... But... That would mean that my pig is in love with... With... _THAT!_" Ginny gestured to Draco, who looked torn between laughter, euphoria, and skepticism.  
"What? I don't think I'm in _love_ with him. Sure, I might like him a bit, but not _love_... Right?" Harry's voice seemed to be very small.  
"Wait, you like me?" Draco's eyes lit up, and without waiting for an answer, took Harry's face in his hands and kissed him soundly.  
"EEEEEWWWW!" Ginny jumped up and ran away, sobbing. Neville go up and raced after her like a knight in shining pajamas.  
"Excuse me, students." Dumbledore tried to get the attention of the Great Hall... and failed. Everyone was staring at Harry and Draco in morbid fascination.  
Then Hermoine started squealing.  
"They look so cute together!"  
And then, the most horrible thing happened in Hogwarts history.  
Fangirls were made.  
DUNN DUNN DUNN!  
And everyone died from their screaming (some were trampled on).  
The end.


End file.
